Time flies. Today, Friday June 18th, is the last day of my sick leave. I underwent surgery on May 17th, a month ago, to remove a large fibroid in my uterus. The first week post-op was difficult, having to deal with the pain. But still, I am pretty proud of myself for being this resilient and recovering so well, despite the anxiety that I had had before the surgery. Who wouldn't be apprehensive having their body cut open for the first time? At the ward hours before the surgery, my systolic reading when my blood pressure was taken was 144! That falls under Stage 2 hypertension. My usual systolic reading is always around 90. The nurse asked me straightaway if I was feeling nervous. I was surprised myself since I felt normal, and was chatting cheerfully with the hospital staff. I guess I was really doing a good job in suppressing my anxiety then. I have this habit of thinking about positive things when I feel nervous, so that morning, I kept on telling myself that this was exciting as it was the first time I would undergo surgery. That was why I was generally feeling good although in actual fact, I was still nervous inside. After about 15 minutes, the second blood pressure reading was slightly better -- systolic reading was about 133.
Surgery was over at around 5pm. I woke up in the waiting room, not from the pain, but from the noise of medical staff bustling around. Then, I felt the pain but as long as I lay still, it was manageable. After a while, a medical staff noticed I was awake and asked me if I was in pain. She must have noticed my discomfort. I just replied that I felt like peeing! I guess I felt different down there because of the tube they have inserted right into my bladder. Haha... another thing that surprised me was my voice. It sounded weak and a bit distant, and each time I tried to talk, I felt as if I wanted to cry. It was confusing because there was no reason for that -- I could still bear with the pain. In retrospect, I think it might be a choking sensation as a result of the breathing tube down my throat throughout the surgery. No wonder my throat felt a bit sore after that.
I felt quite alert as they were wheeling me back into my room. Even when there was a confusing moment when they were trying to figure out whether I was in room 1006 or 1008 (I was admitted earlier in 1008 as shown in hospital records, but later requested for a two-person ward, hence the change to room 1006), I was able to tell them that it was room 1006. I think they were a bit surprised also when I answered them. Maybe they thought I was still semi-conscious, or else they would have asked me directly instead of arguing. It was about 5.45pm when I was back in my ward. First thing I did was to ask for my handphone from my mum, who had been patiently waiting there since I was wheeled in for surgery. I was able to update my friends in the church choir, my colleagues and ex-colleagues that I was out from surgery and everything was okay. They had been praying and rooting for me days before the surgery, in fact, some of them texted me early that morning to show their moral support. So, I thought I owed them this much to update them on my condition as soon as possible. Then, after that, it was pretty much dozing on and off. When I was conscious, I would be texting my friends on Whatsapp, who were all eager to know how I was doing, and also chatted with my mum. Every time when I woke up and spoke, my voice got stronger and clearer. I was expecting to feel weak the whole night, so that was a nice surprise. My mum left at about 8pm, as the ward did not allow anyone to stay overnight. Plus, with Covid-19 SOPs, only one unique visitor was allowed a day, so since my mum came that day, my sister was not allowed in when she came to fetch my mum home. Luckily, I had friends who kept me company through Whatsapp text, particularly Belinda, my close friend, who checked on my condition at 2 - 3 hour intervals. Being a doctor, she was able to give me some advice to help me monitor my own condition. Chatting with her helped to occupy my time too, but after being given my painkiller injection at around 10pm, I was feeling drowsy and had to say good night to her. That day was her birthday, so it was a bit sad that I could not spend the day with her. But we celebrated it the night before, eating take-away sushi in my house.
Over the next two days, my recovery went on well. My mum did not come visit on the second day as I told her not to, to lower the risk of Covid-19 infection. Besides, my sister would have a chance to visit me and help me bring back the fruit baskets sent by the Multimedia Team and choir group from my church. The smell of flowers was nice, and even the nurses liked it! The doctor had told me that she could discharge me the next day if all went well. I definitely needed the help to carry those fruit baskets home before that. My sister eventually came in the evening after work, and helped to bring back one fruit basket. At least my mum could carry the other one when I got discharged the next day. I could already feel much improvement on the second and third day. Even when taking regular painkillers, it was still painful if I needed to push my body up or lie back down, but the pain was steadily decreasing day by day.
The doctor allowed me to walk on the third day, after she told me she was going to discharge me that morning. I was glad to be able to walk again after lying on the bed for one day and a half. I did as much walking as I could, as I was told that this would help with recovery. It was a few hours' wait for the discharge order, so I got the chance to walk around the maternity ward and went a few times to the babies' nursery. They were the ones who were crying so loudly at night, but looked so adorable when they were asleep in their incubators. By the time I got my discharge note, and taken my medications at the pharmacy, it was around 2.30pm. Luckily, my choir friend Amy was free at that time to fetch me and my mum from hospital. With her, there will always be a lot of laughs, but that day was the one day I wished I didn't laugh. The pain on my stomach was unbearable! I was laughing and moaning in pain at the same time... from the photo that Amy took of me and uploaded onto the Whatsapp chatgroup, everybody said that I looked good for someone who had just had open surgery. I felt in a good mood too.
My condition improved steadily while recuperating at home. After the first week, I was already able to get out of bed without having to bear the excruciating pain of exerting my abdomen muscles, and having to pull myself up with my two hands. The only unbearable thing during the first ten days post-op was not being able to wash my hair, shower or eat certain food that could complicate the healing process, as per Chinese tradition. Imagine the liberating feeling I had when I could finally shower! However, I still had to continue abstaining from certain food like eggs, mushrooms and cucumbers for a while longer.
One thing I was looking forward to post-op was for my friends to come visit me. I was really worried that I would be stressed out from being stuck at home. In fact, they had already told me their plans to visit even before my surgery, but unfortunately, the government announced a total national lockdown due to the sudden spike of Covid-19 cases. House visits were strictly prohibited. So this was how I ended up spending the whole month recuperating at home without the company of my friends. At least, I had my mum and sister with me to keep me from going completely crazy.
Fast forward to today, we are still under a national lockdown until June 28th. But thanks to technology, I can still keep in touch with my friends through Whatsapp. I have spent the whole week preparing materials for my online lessons next week. Frankly speaking, I am rather nervous, as I have not done full online teaching before, unlike my other colleagues who started since January this year. That's because I was part of the physical classes team, charged with teaching SPM 2020 candidates who would sit for their SPM late February. Then in March, I was exempted from online teaching as I was one of the examiners marking the SPM scripts online. As this was the first time SPM scripts were marked online, there were some technical problems which delayed the whole process, so the marking period extended from two weeks to two months, to only finish at the end of April. By then, schools were reopened and I taught two weeks of physical classes before the Hari Raya holidays. Then, it was time for my surgery. So, I expect a tiring week ahead, as I adjust to this new norm of full online classes.
But I must be optimistic. If I could go through an open surgery, one of the top ten on my list of scary experiences, I would definitely survive online teaching. After all, I did this last year too, although it was once or twice a week then, as we had a more flexible system of teaching during the first national lockdown. And today, I had my first tuition class after my surgery -- done online too due to the lockdown. I had wanted it to be sort of like a warm-up lesson for me before next week. One difference of online teaching is that teachers need to prepare more digital materials to ensure effective learning, so a lot of time is spent in front of the computer preparing slides, Google Forms and filtering Youtube videos. Well, I will need to make sure that my weekend is fully utilised to finish all this preparation so that I don't kick myself by Sunday night for not doing enough. That will make me anxious and I can look forward to a sleepless night. Let's hope this will not happen...
